Monday, July 14, 2014

Goodbye.

http://jayjage.tumblr.com/

I'm onto a new phase in life (you'll know if you have me on Instagram or Facebook!) so why not a new blog too? Tumblr's always been my favorite site and I thought it would be easier to manage all my blogs from one dashboard. Plus, I love the theme I've got going on!

As per yoosh, you can expect long ass word posts, as well as meaningless pictures from my everyday life. Added bonus of hosting my personal blog on Tumblr is that I get to reblog quotes that I can relate to personally, and tons of pictures of cute animals.

http://jayjage.tumblr.com/
If you're on Tumblr, you can follow meeeeee :) If you don't, then you need to GET ON IT (and follow me) haha.

Mushy alert: A bajillion thanks to everyone who's been following my blog for so long (even though I get lazy all the time). Some of you found me four years ago, some four URLs ago, and some just stumbled onto this one and stuck around. I really appreciate every single one of you, and it's amazing to know that I share so much common ground with so many other people in the world. I'm still going to continue blogging- just on a different host, with a different theme/blogskin, and a different URL. NOW MEMORIZE MY NEW BLOG URL AND COME READ ME!! Haha I love you all xxxxxxx

Monday, July 7, 2014

Open flame.

In one of my Psychology lectures last year, we learned that pain is necessary. When you hover your palm too close over an open flame, your body registers the sting and you instinctively withdraw your hand to avoid any permanent injuries. Some people try so hard to wish away their pain but if you lose the ability to feel pain, it might be too late before you realize your entire body's on fire.

So I choose to be grateful for my pain. Not because I'm some kind of masochist, but because it proves that my body is still alive and still trying to survive. My brain is still sending me warning signals to keep moving forward so that I can put more and more distance between myself and my "open flame".

Friday, July 4, 2014

Prospect.


In the midst of living for you, I forgot about myself. I didn’t realize how much I was doing for you. I didn’t realize a lot of my decisions and actions were designed with you in mind - sleeping at a certain time, watching certain shows, wearing certain clothes. I don’t blame you or anything; these are choices I made. But while you so carelessly move on with your life, I am still trying to get my life back on track. Back to the pre-You times.

And I’ll get there.

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

30th June 2014.

I miss you. I miss you at different points of the day; usually because something actively reminds me of you, and occasionally because thoughts of you just creep into my head. Though lately, it seems like everything reminds me of you. That's the problem when someone is integrated in almost every part of your life. When they're gone, you are left with feeling like chunks of you have been ripped out.

I miss you so much. Sometimes, I stare at your phone number blankly, as if you would magically call me at the same moment, as if I will get to hear your voice again. Sometimes, when something happens to me - good or bad - I anticipate how I will tell you the story when I get home in the evening. Until I remember you won't be there to listen to it anymore. Sometimes, I still smile from remembering small and silly traditions we used to have.

"The most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained."

I wish I got to say goodbye properly. But if I could wish for anything, I would wish for you to still be here. I don't know how to mourn for the loss of you. Don't know if I still have the right to grieve over you, or if I should be forgetting about you. I say that as if I have a choice. Someone told me today that death leaves a heartache that no one can heal, and it's true. No one can fill this gaping hole that you've left, no one can come even remotely close to the role you played in my life. But love leaves a memory that no one can steal too.

I loved you. I love you. I have that, and all the memories you created with me. I have that, and the knowledge that someone as amazing as you once loved me too. I pray that you are with God now, where there is no more death, no more grief or crying or pain. I pray that there truly is life after life, because I need to know that I will be able to see you again.

I miss you.




Sunday, June 29, 2014

Because I know you'll be reading this...

...I'm sorry.

I know I've hurt you and you are the last person to deserve something like this. I'm having a hard enough time so I can only imagine how you're feeling right now. Please just know that I never meant for it to go this far. I was caught off guard and before I knew it, I was in too deep.

I don't have any excuses so I'm just sorry.

Saturday, June 28, 2014

"rest my heart on your words."

I saw Jehki for the first time since we broke up. It was mostly to sort out/return stuff that we have of each other, but I guess it was also an excuse for us to catch up. He seemed well. Healthy. It started off pretty awkward, with us shooting routine questions back and forth.

"How are you?"

I'm fine, how are you?

"I'm good."

Okay.

There was always a slight tension in the air, but I didn't expect anything less. 20 minutes in, I felt more comfortable and it felt more like old times. We got into the more personal questions. Turns out, we're both dating other people now. I miss him. He misses me. But not in the same way anymore. I don't think we're ready to be friends yet, but we'll get there in time.

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Let's go to the beach, each. Let’s go get away.

Divya and I have been trying to do something everyday of the week to make up for us being complete hermits during the exam period. And since the weather was so summery (that means sunshine!) today, we decided to head to the beach!

But before that, we went for a cheeky brunch at the Chocolate Cafe and I had the most indulgent Belgian waffle w/ ice-cream.

Look at that beaut- hits all the right spots ;)

So then we took a hour-long bus ride to Broadstairs. I've been to quite a few beaches around Kent and the one in Broadstairs is probably the nicest so I reckon the journey was well worth it.

Just look at it!

Sand in my shoes but I don't care~


Someone's not a happy bunny because the wind is messing with her hair.

xx

Friday, June 13, 2014

Dear You,

thank you.

I've always imagined that if we ever broke up, it would be executed in this way- no nastiness, no faults, no regrets. Even as we parted ways, you remain the same person that I have known and loved for the last ten years. So thank you, thank you that even as we reach the end of the road, you are still as genuine, good, and kind as you have ever been. This break up was unbearable, but I would never exchange our relationship for anything else.

You've fixed me. Please know that I will be eternally grateful for that. Before our three years together, I was a cynical lover, a faithless girlfriend. You transformed me; taught me to love with abandon, and gave me a reason to look forward to a future that included another person. And as I detach myself from the ideal of 'us', I find myself still seeking happiness and love with a hopeful heart. I'm no longer afraid to love, and I no longer equate "letting someone in" as "being vulnerable". All of this is a result of your impact in my life. While every other guy I've been with have left me more broken, you left me intact and even more whole than I've ever been.

"You gave me a love so deep that even the ocean would be jealous."

This is so true of you. No one's ever loved me the way you did, not as completely, not as thoroughly. Sometimes I think maybe no one ever will. But I can't limit myself and stop myself from finding out if that's true. You taught me to put myself out there and that's what I will do. The first thing you said in your first letter to me was "let go of your residual baggage", and I have.

Hand on heart, I wish you all the happiness in the world. No one is more deserving than you to find joy. And as I bid farewell to 'us' in this electronic letter, I want you to know that I am leaving with only positive feelings of what has happened and what is to come. I will not tarnish what we had with pity and grief.

I will always love you, Jehki.
I will remember the way you loved me, I will miss you from time to time, and I will strive to find something/someone else as perfect in my life. Never in comparison to you, but so that I will get to feel that way again.
I will always love you.

x

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Summertime!


Having been cooped up in my room for the last two months because of essays and exams, I am finally free and out in the sun!!! Summer in England this year is glooooorious!


Of course, what better way to celebrate my freedom than a BBQ in the field with Divya (aka flatmate/best friend)?! We more or less have an annual BBQ tradition going on (2013, 2012). Only this time, SJ wasn't around :(

Look at this goofball.




Brought my fisheye and wide-angled lenses out to play- I'm loving how the pictures are turning out!

Oh, meat feast.

We had chicken wings, cumberland sausages, burgers, and lamb skews. What more can we ask for?!








Such a good day! Food-filled, sun-filled, and music-filled. Can you believe that summer's only just begun and I've already had three barbecues?! Might be slightly addicted but I cannot wait for our next one :) xx

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Weak moment.

My heart aches. It's ached like this once before so I know what it means. But knowing does nothing for the pain. I wish I could scream my feelings at you, to say I love you without having to feel guilty, to say I love you without knowing it will mess both of us up even more. I wish I could hear you say the same words back one more time.

I've saved every picture you sent me, every letter you wrote, every voice message you recorded - they are all I have left now.

I just miss you so much and I feel so sorry for what we're doing to each other.









I love you.

Friday, April 4, 2014

December 2010 - March 2014

Jehki and I have broken up.

This is not day-fresh - or even week-fresh - news, but I've struggled for quite a bit about putting it on here and letting the whole world know. It's been almost a month now and I think initially, a part of me still imagined us getting back together. Writing about it on my blog would make that impossible and make it final. But that's what it is now, final.

Only a handful of people knew about this and most of them were devastated because as much as I find it hard to fathom, people 'shipped' us. From the messages I've received, I know many of you do as well, and it probably has a lot to do with why you read my blog in the first place. So I guess that's why I feel the need to let you in on this part of my life, even though talking about it is the last thing I want to do.

Jehki and I have been through a lot for the past three years, from our friendship, to our long-distance relationship, to Holly, to my health, to his business, to my insecurities, to his grandma's passing. Before your mind wanders, I just want to clarify that neither of us did anything wrong, neither of us cheated. It wasn't the distance taking a toll on us, and it definitely wasn't because we stopped loving each other. Although I can't completely reveal why we are breaking up, I don't want anyone to think that we had anything but a mutual and amiable break up.

It's heartwrenching when you have to let go of someone you've shaped your life around, but this was a decision we came to together. To give a very political and annoying (but still accurate) reason: We broke up because we wanted different things in life. Rather than staying in this relationship purely out of love, we thought it would be better to free ourselves and be with other people who might want the same things. Ultimately, we are at a point in life where we date to marry and the thing we disagree on impedes on marriage directly, so splitting up was the right thing to do.

Right now, Jehki and I are just trying very hard to move on. We've stopped speaking since the break up but it's not permanent. We were best friends before anything romantic, and like we promised each other 3 years ago, we will always be best friends at the end of the day. We agreed to see other people in the meantime and that's what we are both doing. When we're ready, we'll go back to bantering like old buds again.

I know I'll be writing another blogpost about this when I can wrap my head around this reality. But for now, I just wanted to get the news out there. I haven't been able to tell most of my friends about this break up, so I'm also hoping they read my blog regularly enough to see this.

And if you're wondering, I am okay xx

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Oh, Milano.

I made a Valentine's trip to Milan this year to meet my man! I've been there twice before to visit J, but this trip was so different in a good way. I don't really have words for it but it was the best two days of my life. Maybe it's Valentine's Day, maybe it's being in a foreign country with someone I love, maybe it's just Italy. Milan, though dusty and cold, was incredibly romantic.


We walked everywhere, visited the beautiful Duomo Cathedral again, and had a staycation in a B&B away from the city centre. It's now my favorite place in the world, even surpassing Venice, simply because of the memories it holds for me.

|| Babe, thank you for planning such an amazing "weekend". Thank you for making this minute occasion feel like my birthday, Christmas, and good Friday all came together in one. Thank you for loving my friends like they are your own and for sending them little gifts every Valentine's Day. I can never predict what surprises you will spring on me and I think after this trip, I will give up on trying to "up" you. You're a Yoda-level romantic and I just can't beat that.

Sometimes I wish I could see myself through your eyes. I wish I could understand how you could love me this much, to enjoy doing so much for someone as undeserving as me. I'm not complaining but I am amazed. Love you xxx

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Love is hardly perfect.

It really isn't and you learn it the hard way. As you know from my previous post, J and I were in a disgusting honeymoon phase (for some reason!?) and we decided we had to break out of it because we were becoming really unproductive. I don't get any work done anymore because I am constantly checking my phone and he is always distracted at work. But the problem with breaking away is the timing. We could never get it right/synchronized so sometimes, it felt like one of us cared more about the other. Also, issues like this magnify in long-distance relationships because texting/calling is essentially the only form of contact you have.

It was very silly and to be honest, I was "tolerating" J for a very long time because while I understood that he was trying to maintain normalcy by texting less, it pissed me off!!! I'm sure he was "tolerating" me as well but that bugger would never admit it because he thinks it's a very offensive word to use in a relationship. I also have to admit that I was being a proper bitch because I refused to tell him he was upsetting me and I played a bit of mind games (without realizing it). This lasted for the whole of three days before he called me out with "where's the open communication you always advise your Tumblr followers?" OH SNAP!!!! So I sucked it up, we talked about it, and it's all rainbows and unicorns now.

I know I always talk about how perfect he is and how happy I am, so I'm just putting this out there to let you know that we are just like any other couple. He is the most amazing man but there are times when my character gets in the way of his and we just have to work around it. I mean, we have been together for three years...there's bound to be friction! So yeah, love is never going to be perfect. It won't always work the way you want it to but that's fine as long as two people are willing to keep fighting together :)

xx


P/s: If you happen to have read my last gibberish entry (which is now deleted), please never speak of it again! That was the aftermath of a space cake when I was in Amsterdam (which I will blog about very soon) and I am not proud of it at all. If you are not one of the lucky few who read it, then you are not a big enough fan of this blog!!! Also, you missed out on some prime mentioning of Divya entering the porn industry (hahahaha, jokes).

Monday, February 24, 2014

Freshly in love.

Things have been so different between J and I lately, and I love it!! I don' even know what brought it on but it seems like we're back to our honeymoon phase. We are texting every second of everyday, we flirt like new flings, he thinks I am "kind and soft and lovely", and I just can't stop smiling whenever I read something he sends me. It's so unusual!

We've already been together for three years and I always thought that the honeymoon train was long gone. Though technically, we were never mushy like this because we were such good friends even before anything happened. Whatever it is, I'm not going to question it. We laugh at our mush from time to time but I'm content with the way things are now :)

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Happy Chinese New Year!

Ok, this might be a little late seeing that CNY has ended but better late than never! 2014 is another year I am away from my family during this festive season but Divya and I definitely made the best of it :)

We went grocery-shopping, made ourselves a cozy steamboat dinner and decorated our flat! Pretty sure the decorations will stay up for the rest of the year haha.

Posing for a family portrait here with a baby-sized chicken we found in the supermarket. 



Disclaimer: Div made me mock my race with the peace signs. She is very very racist.

Jokes aside, I really look forward to being with my fam next year. Everyone else was posting about reunion dinners and first day of visiting on Facebook and Instagram, and it just made me really envious. In 2015, I'll finally have yusheng and angbaos again!

HUAT AH! :D

Friday, January 31, 2014

G.

If there's one person I'm really thankful for meeting in 2013, it's G. He's a psychology student like me, but I only met him in my final year. It was hilarious the way we became friends, actually. It was the first lecture of the term and halfway in, the lecturer kept going on and on about a guy named Simmons.

"Poor Simmons came up with a theory..."
"Poor Simmons conducted a study..."

It went on for about 5 minutes and I started flipping through my lecture notes trying to find out about Simmons' background. I was so confused because I didn't understand why the lecturer thought he was such a poor thing. I think I mumbled something along the lines of "What's so sad about this guy?" and everyone around me stared at me weirdly. That confused me even more until G, who was sitting beside me, said "Not POOR Simmons...PAUL SIMMONS." We looked at each other and literally burst out laughing!!! I've survived well with the English accent for the past two years but never have I imagined falling victim to something as stupid as this!! G still uses this incident to tease me for being "so chinese". Haha.

That's basically how we became friends and since then, we've been hanging out almost every week, even when we don't have the same lectures. We make time for hot chocolate, a quick meal on campus, and sometimes lunch in town. I like to call him Georgie because we are both hardcore fans of Grey's Anatomy and I like to pretend he's O'Malley.

Honestly, I'm really grateful to have him as a friend. He's cool. The time he came into my life was the same time when I felt like I was losing another close man-friend. I was gutted but in a way, he filled that void. G feeds me banter and no-bullshit truths and advice to "stop being such a girl". He puts in effort as a friend and I really appreciate that. For example, when I went home for Christmas, he still bothered to Facetime/Skype me in wee hours of the morning. More importantly, he's been through something I am going through right now and he understands some things about me that few people can. It's only been 5 months of friendship but I've grown so much closer to him. He's just always been there.

Just this morning, I was feeling a little upset so he met me outside my flat. We went for a walk while I ranted like a little bitch, stopped by his place for tea, and I felt so much better after.

I have gained and lost so many people in my life since I've been here, so I treasure those who are here to stay. G is one of them, as far as I know.


//I haven't forgotten about J (in case you were wondering) and he is still the person I hold dearest to my heart. That won't change. Georgie and I share a very platonic friendship and J is fully supportive of that!

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

How To Be A Friend.

I spent the entire day with friends today and I'm home now feeling fulfilled from the htht we had, and yet completely spent from the things I found out. Being in the UK has made me so detached and oblivious to the tension that has been brewing in one of my friendship groups. Today made me think about myself as a friend and as an individual.

Ever since I left Singapore, one of the biggest alterations I have made to my life is the friends that I keep. Right now, I can confidently say that the people I surround myself with are those I would label as my "close friends" and those I am willing to sacrifice a lot for. I can't say the same before 2010 because then, I had a misconstrued idea of what friendship meant. It's easy to form friendships but hard work comes when you have to maintain these friendships. It takes more than the occasional meet-up or a courtesy text. A friendship worth keeping is one that has honest communication and the relinquishing of ego.

Honest communication- A lot of what is going on right now has gotten so much worse over time because people just REFUSE to be honest with one another. Every time anyone comes to me with a problem that involves another person, the first thing I suggest is for them to talk about it and fix it together. Every time. It's the same with families, couples, and friends. Sometimes, I get the same response, "But I am not the confrontational type". IT'S NOT ABOUT BEING CONFRONTATIONAL. There is no need to be aggressive or to turn it into a war. Communicating your insecurities and anger is the best way to clear any misunderstandings, to remove the possibility of wrong assumptions, and to show that you are still making an effort. More importantly, it gives the other party a chance to change and make amends. I cannot accept people who claim to treasure a relationship yet refuse to be honest about their feelings. In my book, it's the same as declaring an intention to give up. A relationship simply cannot function without honest communication. Problems don't just disappear and you don't just stop feeling lousy because you "gave it time".

Ego- This is more so for people who are on the receiving end of an "honest communication". Some people, like myself, have so much ego that they can have it for dinner. Whenever I hear something negative about my behavior or my personality, my very first reaction is to be defensive and swat away these accusations. But being so prideful will only put up a wall that blocks all attempts of raw honesty. After years and years of practice, I've learnt to put my ego aside. Today when I found out that a friend was hurt by what I did, the first thing I said to her was an apology. It was never my intention to hurt her but I did anyway, so I accepted my fault and apologized before anything else. It took a lot out of me to not defend myself but it was the right thing to do.


I am writing this post for so many reasons. To remind myself not be an assholic friend, to remind YOU what you already know but don't practice (don't think I don't know), and I guess a small part of me wishes my friends would read this and understand where I am coming from. I spent three hours texting people individually tonight, hoping to create a platform for reconciliation, but I think emotions are peaking right now and little of what I am saying is getting through to them. I'm genuinely afraid I cannot fix things before I leave Singapore.

But come what may, this post is my honest communication.

Monday, December 23, 2013

Yuandiggy.


The best part of being home is getting to see my baby again. I've been taking are of yuanyuan full-time for the past few weeks and I'm loving every minute of it! Pretty sure she's sick of me though. 

When I went to Bangkok, I bought shit loads of clothes for her. And I made her try them on ><

She was kinda annoyed at first but then she started posing for the camera. I mean, look at that professional model pose in the fourth picture?!

Awwwwwww~

This is her pyjamas and it's adorable!!

Now, she poses every time I whip out my camera (and food).

THIS IS SO CUTE.


Love her to bits :) x

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Homecoming.

J is coming home tomorrow!!!!!! I can't even describe how happy I am.

As I am typing this out now, I'm sitting on his bedroom floor. His mum let me in and I just spent the last two hours decorating every inch of it with our pictures, fairy lights and some Christmas-y stuff. LDR has made me such a mush, but it's our third anniversary very soon and I want to do something girlfriend-like.

Also, I've been stuffing my face with his mum's cooking and playing with Oden (his dog) for the past hour. Can't think of a better way to spend my Saturday :)

I really miss J... Just being in his room reminded me so much of us before we both left Singapore. It wasn't necessarily a happier time, but it was definitely simpler; we had no idea what LDR had in store for us. I miss laying together with him without having to worry about the expiration of our time together. I miss writing on his desk and sticking post-its all over the place. I miss leaving his house at the end of the day and having the luxury of saying "See you tomorrow".

Two more years. Two more years before we can be in the same place again. Cannot wait to see him on Monday :) x

Friday, December 20, 2013

If they dusted my heart for fingerprints, they would only find yours.

I'm feeling particularly loved right now... :)

Ever since 8-9 months ago, I've been hit with one bad news after another, particularly with my health. And because J and I have always maintained an open and honest communication with each other, he has also been on the receiving end of these haunting news. I've tried protecting him but it never worked out for either of us - he knows me too well to know when I am troubled by something and it only stresses him out more when he doesn't know what it is, and I...I've always needed him more than I care to admit. Somehow, his strength compensates for the loss of mine. So I surrendered to the fact that I will have to share everything with him, good or bad.

Safe to say, I have put him through hell ever since but I must say that he has been nothing short of amazing. Trekking through all the bad, things finally took a positive turn yesterday. I heard back some really encouraging news and when I SOS skyped him in the middle of the day to tell him, he surprised me by crying.

I saw the relief wash over his face and it struck me speechless. I mean, of course I know that he loves me, but I guess I have always overlooked the depth of it. Until now, I still find it incredible that someone who isn't obligated to love me, loves me so much.


So thank you, J. Thank you for bearing a weight that wasn't even yours to begin with. Thank you for loving me as much as you do and I can only promise that I will love you back just as much :)


xx

P/s: We are turning 3 on Monday!!!

(I'm sorry I can't detail what actually happened. Only a handful of people know and I plan to keep it that way. But that wasn't the point of this post anyway! Haha.)

Monday, December 16, 2013

Food coma in Bangkok.

Heya peeeps, I'm live-blogging in Bangkok! It's my last day here and I'm making use of every minute to shop and eat and shop and eat.

This picture basically sums up my trip here...I ate so much! Even as I'm blogging now, I'm having a lunch break. Thai people really know their food and if you stick to places outside of shopping malls, you're almost guaranteed cheap, good food. 

My brother and Melody did their research well and brought us to some really good places. So here are the few best ones I think you should definitely check out:

1. T & K Seafood


The food was pretty good and with 6 dishes (+ drinks) between the 4 of us, we only paid 1300baht (S$52)! I recommend the deep fried squid and tom yam soup, but stay away from the fried rice.

You might even see this boss of a cat chilling in a cardboard box when you're there. 

T&K is located in Chinatown but if you can't find it, try asking store owners along the main street.

Address: 
49-51 Soi Phadung Dao
Chinatown, Bangkok

2. Somtam Nua


Somtam was good but really spicy. It's not as cheap as T&K but still very affordable. I think it was about S$65+ for 7 dishes. Try the barbecued pork neck, it was soooo addictive and succulent and tender and [insert yummy food adjectives].

Just looking at it is making me have major cravings.

Somtam is located in Siam Square so it's a nice lunch/dinner option after shopping! It was pretty much packed when we got there so I assume it's a popular choice.

Address:
392/14 Soi Siam Square 5
Rama 1 Road, Bangkok

3. After You


Throwing a hipster dessert cafe in the mix!

You may have seen it on my Instagram (@hawtvintage) - the shibuya honey toast is da bomb! I'm more amazed by the amount of butter infused in the toast than anything else. And because it's such a huge portion, I couldn't even finish it.

They have different kinds of toasts (nutella, ferrero rocher, toffee) but I reckon honey toast is the best. 

Don't bother trying their caramel custard pudding and pancakes. Seriously, STICK TO HONEY TOAST. But you should have their chocolate mud brownie because it was the shizz. 

Address:
Siam Paragon, 1st level

4. OISHI Grand

This next one is a Japanese and International buffet and it is awesome!!!!! There's so much variety (think sushi, dim sum, grilled seafood, beef steak) and the food is mostly incredible. More importantly, it only cost around S$30 per person. Say whaaaaaaaat. For the same dinner, you probably have to pay twice as much in Singapore. 

Unfortunately, I don't have pictures of everything because my camera couldn't keep up with my greediness.


I love me some prawns.

Dessert spread was not impressive but they had Haagen Dazs ice cream!

Address:
Siam iDiscovery, 2nd level

5. Nara Thai 

We more or less stumbled onto this place when we were in Central World. It is pretty pricey (2100baht/S$85 for four) but the food was yummy.


Their tom yam soup is a must-try but don't bother with the pad thai. Omelette was good too!

Address:
Central World, 7th Level


There you go, five food spots for you to check out :D xx

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Early Christmas.

By the time you're reading this, I will be on my flight home! But before that, here's how I spent my last 2013 weekend in Engerlando (aka England).

I don't think many of you know this but I have an aunt who lives in London. I don't visit her as much as I would like because I don't really have time (in between juggling Uni work and Jehki) but she drove down to Canters with Richard (her partner) on Friday to help me with my luggage.


This is only one third of the amount of crap I have but it's already mountain-high.

I spent the weekend at her place in London and because I will be missing Xmas in UK, we celebrated it together. I also got to solo-decorate a tree for the first time!

The saddest-looking tree... 

...But I jazzed it up! Just look at this masterpiece. 100 points for effort! The back of the tree is bare though hahaha.

Amazing Xmas dinner my aunt prepared - Turkey, goose fat roasted potato (BEST THING EVER), and asparagus.

That's my cousin, Tristan, my aunt and Richard! :)

I basically ate my weekend away because my aunt is like the master of mastetchef. And yesterday, I helped prepare a fingerfood feast because there were guests coming over.

Look at this spread!


I baked cupcakes as well but they look better than they taste, so don't be fooled.

Cutest spoons!

I'm waiting to board my flight now. Cannot wait to be with my fam but my parents have no clue that I am back so early. Hahahha. Shout-out to the best brother in the world who is coming to pick me up from the airport and then making dinner to celebrate my homecoming.

See you babies tomorrow! xx