Close your eyes, clear your heart. Let it go.

If you look into my eyes, you can see grief; the grief that is now part of who I am and part of every thing I do and think. You can also see fatigue. Crying makes my eyes so tired, I have no choice but to go to sleep. And if sleep is being in a relaxed state of mind, then all I'm doing is to close my eyes and to open them up again when my eyelids find the strength. I am in this zombie mode because when I close my eyes, my mind never rests and never stops thinking of you; and when I open my eyes, the nightmares never end.

Is there a stronger word for crying? Sobbing? Weeping? Bawling? Nothing seems to describe how I'm feeling. Is there a word that stands for "to cry one's heart and soul out"?