Hawtvintage.

Actually, I'm not. Why do people love talking behind your back? Like they can be your best friends in school but they turn to other people to dish dirt about you. I think the safest people to be around are the people who aren't close to you. Because this way, they won't even bother talking bad about you. Or when they do, it won't even matter to you.

I hate people who hate parts of you then go bitch about it on their blogs. I used to do that then I realized, if you have the guts to think it, have the fucking guts to do it. Don't tap on your keyboard and wait for the person you're talking about to read your blog and mourn over it.

I understand I'm no angel, but this is where friends come in and tell you where you should change. Not go behind your back and yada yada to other people or whine on their little online space. I know what you're thinking. Aren't I doing the same, blogging it out too? That's because I fucking said my piece and it became the reason why I am hated by my friend.

To you (you know who you are): You are my best friend so
I'm sure you know how I feel now. If you don't, here's a clue ->
it's exactly how I felt when Sbester chose that little ahlian girl over me.
You get it? You should, because you were there for me.

Look at the time this entry was posted. I am awake at this bloody hour because I feel sad over something like this. Not just by your words, but by your unspoken actions. I'm sure you're thinking how I can possibly feel this extremely when your words were only mentioned in passing, very brief and not even directed specifically to me. Go figure. I'm not going to use mean words on you like I would a random bitch, because I know I will regret it later on. After this entry, I will act like nothing has happened between us, because I am a fucking coward. I don't want this to drive a stake down our friendship.

You have done some things to make me angry in the past but
this one's your masterpiece. I may not appear as a softie and that is because I am not. But this doesn't mean I don't have the capacity to be affected by another person's words, especially when that person is my best friend. "Best friend" is not my catchphrase and I don't use it casually. In my 18 years, I have only had a few people I can call them that. I admit I have scolded you, been a demanding bitch and thrown tantrums. But I have also given in to you, worried for you, and protected you. When shangw calls to make a date, I make sure you don't want to go out with me first. This time, you have cut me very very deep. If you feel even that little bit of guilt, please delete the blog entry by 29 August 2009, or at least that specific part and I will feel super happy. If not, I will know your two cents worth of our friendship. This is not an ultimatum, this is a window period to sustain my faith in you. And please don't talk to me about this issue, I don't want to lie to you.

It took me an hour and fifteen minutes to type this. Eat that.