Relationhardships.

There are a few friends I check up on from time to time; I keep myself updated of their life and try to talk to them as often as I can. Sometimes, it worries me how they can be so happy with their partners in one week, and take a 360-degree turn to become bottom-of-the-mood-chain in the next. It doesn't make sense at all, and it's always over petty stuff that seem to mean the world to them. That's taking bipolar to a whole new level.

A relationship is more than tantrums, being calculative, manipulation, and revenge. It's not "since you hurt me, I will do more shit to hurt you back". That's not how things work, because when you hurt the person you love, the recoil will hit you back in your face and cause twice the pain. And when you do something for someone, you don't compare it to how much you receive in return. You can't say, "I have done this and this and this for you, but you haven't done nearly as much for me," because how tedious it must be, to constantly measure how much effort to put into something so that you are not shortchanged.

I am not a good girlfriend to J; I don't prepare lunchboxes for him, I don't surprise him with random little gifts, and I always forget to check up on him when I get busy. But at least I don't demean his value in my life by manipulating him. If I feel a certain way, I tell him straight out and we work it out together. That's how relationships work, isn't it? It's reciprocal, it's two-sided, and every emotion is reflected in each other.

If it's becoming torturous for you to stay in your relationship, then just walk away and find a better one. Otherwise, stop whining and work through it, because the problem isn't going to resolve itself.